Select Your UPC Program SECTIONS ------------ Program Schedule Daytime Evenings Primetime Latenight Super Latenight Kidscrap! PROGRAMS ------------ The A-Files The Ambulance Brothers America's Funniest Abortions America's Least Wanted As the World Gossips Bikini Beach Black Kid and a Stick The Bold & the Horny The Bystander Celebrity Autopsy Cooking & Subservience Cracker The Ebola Boys Everybody Loves Hitler Fear the Day News Fogey Views Fucked Up By an Angel Gilligan's Invention Good God America Honky Talk Hookers on Phonics I Didn't Do It! I Hate Mondays InterVIEW w/ Gerald Ford JAG/OFF Jimmy Carter's Rebuttal Kenny the Talking Carp LaVonne & Shelly Life's a Beach w/ Sandy Bunns Leave it to Lorena! Mall Cops The Newman Show The New Benny Hill Show The Omnipotent Seven Pakistan & Barbara Puppet Regime Quantum Leak Rick Moranis Presents Salinger! Satire Day/Night Live/Taped South Bikini Beach Spic 'N Span Sucker For Love They're Not From Earth UPC Saturday Night Movie World's Worst Typos

		Star Trek: Nude & Rude 1:00AM ET/PT Weeknights & Saturday This new Star Trek spin-off promises the horniest crew in Star Trek history, and no regulation Starfleet uniforms in sight! A Vulcan's ears aren't the only thing that's long and pointed! Yes, they're boldly coming where no one has come before, and you'll finally get to see how we get all these half-human half-klingon, half-human half-vulcan, half-human half-borg, etc., that we have on all the other shows. Your Prime Directive is to watch this show!

	Bugle Brigade 1:30AM ET/PT Sundays They're the screwiest company in the whole darn army, and they like it that way! Watch as their practical jokes and tongue-in-cheek antics make the Nazis laugh in spite of their tightass asses! Local Celebrity Dead Pool 2:00AM ET/PT Weeknights Your host Reginald "Shit Magnet" Barflee leads a panel of network TV has-beens and never-weres in a game of premonition and backstabbing as they bet on which regional celebrities will buy the farm in the near future. As always, foul play is fair.. uh, game! Soft Porn Theater 2:00AM ET/PT Saturdays Scoot over Cinemax! Better luck next time, USA! UPC's got the steamiest late-night entertainment this side of X-Rated and that side of pay cable! Think of it as Movies for Guys Who Like Cheesecake. Thank God none of those FCC guys stay up this late!		This Month's UPC Soft Porn Theater Features: "Titty Titty Bang Bang" "Fly Hard" "Titantic Gigantic" "The Hoarse Whisperer"

		God Save Us 2:00AM ET/PT Sunday Watch and repent for watching Soft Porn Theater last night.

Probably True News 2:30AM ET/PT Weeknights Tabloid TV takes the next step with this foray into the world of gossip, rumors and generally accepted assumptions!

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