Will cap for food 19!





DiscoBoy:
Congratulations! You are now a Scientologist! You may pick up your membership packet from Brother Travolta on your way out.


Motis:
"We seem to have wandered a bit from the subject of your income tax audit, Mr. Hubbard."


Laurie2K:
The measurements confirm you're on your way to becoming a red squirrel, Mr. O'Riley. I trust you'll be pleased with the final result and not feel you have to colour your hair gray to fit in with your new and more fashionable relatives.


suggs:
"But Doreen likes the bushy eyebrows. She says they make me look sexy."


nashbrutusandshort:
"Well, Doctor: Sometimes my head, ithurts ithurts, seastorming and cold fire inside, mudthick pain, stiletto-in-a-hornet's-nest pain, bloodrushing angry pain, all up in the noplace behind my lightcreaking eyes." "Well, Mr. Joyce. Whatever your problem is, I don't think it's visual in nature."


144b:
Okay, is this better , one or better twe?. . Uh, two? - SLAP!! Wrong! try again. Better, one or better two? Uh, one? -SLAP! WRONG! Dickweed!


Steve_Reeves:
Dr. Heinrich von Frickenfracker Schicklewhacker introduces his Cheek-o-Matic. Guaranteed to give all humans the possibility of having apple cheeks. Unfortunately, his first patient, seen here, went through life jawless after one treatment and Dr. Frickenfracker Schicklewhacker spent his remaining years creating interesting menu items for Applebee's...


Daleman:
Here's Martha and I at the Grand Canyon. And here we are getting on those dammed donkeys. This one's my favorite, here's Martha doing the whole UNLV baseball team.


TheEar:
"You sunk my battleship! Pretty sneaky, Sis..."


bugwber:
Early attempts at brain surgery failed to produce any results. Well, any GOOD ones, anyway.


Generik:
Here at Thomas Dolby Labs, we work ceaselessly to make sure that you, the customer, are not only blinded, but also deafened by science. "...Science!"


Geier:
"Well, according to my phrenologometer you're a suppressed mass-murderer with a small penis, chronic genital rashes, and an almost undeniable urge to make love to aardvarks." "You can really tell all thaImean that's ridiculous! That thing's not even TOUCHING my head." "Okay... ...Nope, sorry. It still shows murder, chronic rashes, and aardvarks." "BUT I DON'T HAVE A SMALL PENIS!!" "Oh, I, uhm, stand corrected."


nbutlerdidit:
D. W. Griffith knew he had to find a better way to show his new films to prospective buyers... but HOW?


Lanzman:
According to a press release from the reclusive Doctor Scratchnsniff, this remarkable device allows ordinary people to instantly see those "Magic Eye" things.


Nastinkers:
Early Virtual Reality Porn took a little getting used to.


Shandi:
Early breathalizer tests were only a moderate success---they could only measure 180 proof breath, as noted by the softening steel...


Buffoon:
"Is it better like this, or like THIS? This, or like THIS? This, or like..." "It was a helluvalot better before ya jammed this frickin' THING IN MY EYE!!!!"


Agent_Moldy:
"Oops, hold on a sec. Had this retainer measurer set on "ample" setting. Lemme just adjust that back -- it'll only take me a second..."


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