02/11/26
The genius machine has no off-switch
|  Clawby Bartimere Gong   October 14, 2002 A quick
short walk to the beach you wear your blue bikini blue like my heart blue like my teardrops and almost I can see the nipples your boobs, not my heart or teardrops We walk, hand in hand and one more hand like the hand of love a third-wheel who won't take a hint we sit in sand sand in my shorts ass crack! You complain it's cold why must you ruin everything? Shit! Now a crab in my shorts scrotal flesh clamped in shellfish claws selfish claws like something I saw on The Flintstones My pain is red red like the crab pinching my balls Motherfucker Quit laughing, Shelly, you stupid bitch Oh, now You're leaving? Fine Go I would rather date your sister anyway. Fuck these claws of love hurt like a motherfucker and the crab that is too real crab bastard Milestones1853: The snorkel is invented, leading indirectly to the conception of commune reporter Lil Duncan several years later. STD specialists from the CDC would eventually send a robot back in time in an attempt to prevent this chain of events from occurring, but tragically this move caused the Short Circuit franchise of films in the 1980's instead.Now HiringMidwife Crisis. Not entirely sure what this is, but the guys thought it would be funny. So… Hmm. Uh… well, if you have experience delivering babies in a dramatic and dangerous fashion, then I suppose you should dust off your résumé. No freaks please.5 Spin-Offs That Died in Production
 Invent It! I will invent it! A mendable, bendable tube that will heal any wound and smell like the moon for only half a dubloon! A meteor catching net that plays DVDs and warms up your knees and always asks please when you forget to because you... (9/30/02) Mrs. The Pope I'll elope with the Pope on a Sunday in Spain, and I hope that the dope won't pick a day when it rains. For though the walrus and crow might find it refreshing, the sugar-drop people would melt right through the chairs' meshing. And the... (9/16/02) God Only Nose A nose is a nose is a nose. Wouldn't one by any other name smell just as well? What the hell. Call it a hogglebottom and it still smells the sweets. Call it a snot locker, still a nose-shaped hunk o' meat stapled to your face right where... (9/2/02)            |
Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.