Deuce

by Melora Gray

October 27, 2003

slapped so hard his beak was loose.
But Bruce and Luce they called truce,
and drank a can of blue moose juice.
The goose he drank it through a sluice.

Norman Snoran, small recluse,
lives deep inside a red caboose.
He's solitary, one could deduce,
because his swearing is profuse.
Though some think that just an excuse.

Sorta Spellman, allow me to introduce,
a girl for which I have no use.
Some think her sullen, some obtuse.
I can forgive the way she wears a noose,
but not the day she betrayed me for produce!
Zeus is taller than a spruce,
an attribute he puts to misuse.
Storks and stiltwalkers, he does seduce,
until to tears they do reduce,
when they find his love diffuse.

Allow me to induce
a sentiment as dark as mousse,
for characters prone to abuse.
The reasoning may be abstruse,
but just to ponder: What the deuce?

Milestones

1996: Red Bagel fires entire commune staff during "Crazy Bagel's Everything Must Go Liquidation Madness" phase of the commune's August Sale-abration. Analysts praise Bagel for ridding his staff of junkies and losers, who he promptly replaces with the current batch of junkies and losers.

Now Hiring

Bloodhound. Needed to track down former commune staffer Smilin' Jack Costello, who disappeared in May, still owing $8 to the office petty cash fund. Smart dog needed who is not fooled by turbans or overly distracted by running foxes. Generous wages to be paid in beef kidneys.

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Lovely limping little lepers like to lick my Dr Pepper. Lice feel nice as honey-nuts buzz right up a buzzard's butt. Screaming beetles weave through weevils so rude they chewed all my Big League Chew. "Motherfucker!" go call Smuckers ... (9/15/03)